I've wanted to blog for a while. Unfortunately the only things I've wanted to talk about are not appropriate for public viewing. Therefor, I've been avoiding blogging so that my bitterness wouldn't creep out in my writing. Now, I am at a place where I can briefly address it. Here it is: Trust is a big issue for me. Both having it and not having it. As I am a little screwed up, it takes a while for me to trust someone. Being made a fool of by a person I took so long to trust makes me feel humiliated. Honestly, it makes me hurt. I feel like someone motioned for me to come closer so they could tell me a secret and then they punched me in the face. That analogy is so close to the truth, its not every funny. I am currently working on forgiving and forgetting, I am trying very hard. It is the right thing to do. The problem is, I am unsure if my trust was ever deserved. It was deliberately violated while I was placated and tricked into trusting more. That's where I am and that's all I will say about that.
More tomorrow on lighter topics, something I've meant to write about months ago....
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