It's weather like today's that make San Antonio so endearing.

Warm sun, breezy shade, blue skies, green grass, and fluffy clouds that look as if they were painted by Bob Ross. There's more though, recently I came to the realization that this city is now my home.

Sure, people tend to stay in the city they graduated in until they move away to their dream job or go back to the city where they were reared, but this is different. I never wanted to move to Texas and I always planned on moving after I collected my extra degree. Now, however, moving away from here would be painful. After my break-up, I thought moving would be easier since I stayed here for him. He never asked me to stay, but what we had was good and I couldn't just leave and not see it through. Since then, I have made friendships that are enriching my life. Seriously, I can not express enough how amazing my life is because of these people, some whom I have barely known a year. And I realize a lot can take place and change in a year. This time last year, I was in love, hearing wedding bells and picking out names for children. This year, I'm renting a house with roommates, have arthritis, don't have a church job (and I'm not looking, what!?!), I spend most of my time on church property, and have over twenty kids who's voices are in my care and sometimes that scares me. Most importantly, I am surrounded by people who love me for who I am, who I was raised to be. These people support me to do my best in everything instead of bringing me down or thinking my views on life are too conservative.

I started this blog as a "twenty-something" completely confused and a little shy about being a bold follower of my faith. I lived in an apologetic state, knowing I didn't fit in with this culture of death and pleasure, I didn't want to step on anyone's toes. Eventually, apologizing for who I was made me unable to know myself. Forgetting that relying in God for every possible situation or emotion took away my sense of self. Now, my 20s are gone. Clearly I didn't change over night, but now I know who I am, I know my faith won't be shaken, I am strong, and I know my Savior loves me with a love so infinite I could never fully grasp it. With Him as a model, I know that my goal in life is to love everyone as He did, even though my ability to love is minuscule compared to His. Let me be clear, I still have no clue what I'm supposed to do as a career, or even if I'm supposed to have a family. What I do know is that I'm using my gifts to help people worship, to bring young adults together, to help people feel comfortable and wanted, to help people become the best versions of themselves, and again, to love.

Life's not perfect, recent stress has given me emotional break downs. Fully trusting 100% of the time is so hard. So every time I loose it, I collect myself the next day and start over. Being surrounded by my wonderful faith community sure has made this easier to do.

Other notes about my life:
As a HS voice teacher, when summer comes, so does unemployment. 3 months of no income. Last summer a temp job popped up that more than covered my lack of funds. This year, I didn't think the conundrum would be so easy. You see, I like this teaching gig, and I have fallen in love with all of my kids, I can't just drop them for a full time desk job (And there is NO WAY i'm gonna work a summer retail job). So I tried not to get distraught and I tried not to start a job search, trusting that i was indeed doing the work God intended me to do and that either I would be able to save for the summer or that money would come. As if someone handed me a job on a platter, a friend from grad school texted me that a mutual friend needed a voice teacher at a small music studio on my side of town. After telling this friend I was interested, he gave me glowing recommendations to not one but two studios. And just like that, I have two new jobs, ones that will not end during the summer. I also was asked to fill in for a soprano at her church gig for a month right at the beginning of summer.
God wants us to succeed! When we rely on him, he grants us not only grace but opportunities. It is so hard to remember this when getting bogged down with the stress and anxieties of everyday life and that is why I am so very glad to have the amazing support system that I have found. Their constant reminders and example helps me be their reminder and example. What beautiful symbiosis we have.

"Beware that your hearts do not become drowsy from carousing and drunkenness and the anxieties of daily life, and that day catch you by surprise like a trap. For that day will assault everyone who lives on the face of the earth."

Luke 21:34-35