So, I'm sitting here at school.
I had a theory test today, I didn't quite finish it but I'm not too worried about it. However, a few other people in my class are really worried.
Everyday and every uneasy situation I go through, I care less.
If it went crappy, I get mad/sad/annoyed, tweet something angry, then get over it.
I used to hold on to things.
Worry about everything.
I'm not talking about years ago, I'm talking about months.
Something just clicked in me this summer. It's not all good.
For example, I'm not caring enough.
I don't read my ped text book, I don't really study enough. I wait till the last minute to do my homework. I'm not sure what my issue is. But, quite fittingly, I don't care.
Conversely, I practice daily. I sit in the practice room for an hour going over all of my music. I don't know if I accomplish much, but it seems to stick. I know for a fact, it's not enough practice. And today, I only sang through my aria. Nothing more.
You may be wondering what the whole point of this blog is.
Well, I'm not really sure.
I just needed some happy, positive, giggly people and none were to be found. Y'all know me, I'm not really Suzie Sunshine, I usually live in a pretty dark place. I like it there, but I have come to discover that I am actually a pretty happy person.
THEREFORE
I need some positivity people!
I need some happiness
Hell, I'd even go for indifference.
Anythings better that this self loathing, brooding, pessimistic vibe that everyone is having today.
I'm so over it.
I also need a friend in school.
Just one. Everyone has found their favorite person and while the grads spend a lot of time together chatting it up, there are definite pairs. (or so it seems) I just need that one person here that I can navigate towards.
I'm not looking for a "bestie"
I already have those spots filled until death.
Like how I started this blog about how much people complained and then I ended it by complaining?
Well I may indeed be the pot calling the kettle black, but I'm at least a light grey pot...non-stick, if you will....
I will pray you will find a friend. Everyone needs one, especially when you're in a new place. And you are probably suffering from a little bit of scholastic burn-out. Think about how long you've been in school without much of a break. Try to do something to inspire yourself scholastically. I think it would help a little.
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